im still exhausted from beating all the other sperms

(Source: suicide-scars, via crystallized-teardrops)

slydig:

how do i get abs without doing anything

(via loserslol)

hatin:

if you ever feel bad about yourself remember that zac efron has a yolo tattoo

(via seedy)

how do i stop growing up this isn’t fun anymore

(via crystallized-teardrops)

oomshi:

i need a paid break from life

(via loserslol)

tsunamiwavesurfing:

universoullove:

If ur tongue can go faster than my vibrator u win.

but can your vibrator spit on you tho?

can your vibrator zangief pile drive you and put you in a headlock tho?

can your vibrator finish in 3 minutes and tell you to go cook some and slap your ass when you gettin off the bed and ask if you paid his phone bill tho?

(via princessbrat7)

trugazi:

can’t wait to own dogs with u

(via fake-mermaid)